Thursday, December 11, 2008

The Day My Life Began


It was 1994 and I was anxiously fidgeting in the metrodome while people around me chatted, drank, passed drug paraphernalia, and talked about the upcoming event. My Dad, Brother, and Mom were with me and had promised this would be something I would remember forever..... That promise became a reality. In about thirty seconds my world was about to not only stand still but my mind was up for a complete overhaul and after this night things were never the same. When Pink Floyd took the stage the crowds roar shook the stadium and scared the shit out of me, it was my first concert ever and to this day was the biggest crowd i've ever seen. I'd grown up listening to my Dad's music on car trips and found that I liked the music and also the variety. My old man is pretty badass when it comes to music, he likes Zep, Floyd, Tull, and all the other classic rock but he also likes obscure music like Kitaro (awesome) Clannad, Alan parsons, etc... so I grew up with a wide range of music pouring into me (not to mention our annual drive from NY to Idaho was prime time to hit the whole playlist and hear his forays into other genres) But back to Floyd... As they started playing my mind merged with the music and I was brought back to all the trips, places, laughs, anger, and got to have a crazy (probably because of the "hazy" dude next to us) time reliving great childhood memories triggered by music that I never realized I loved. It was LATE when the show ended and to this day all I recall about the drive home was my mom saying how she felt "really weird" and my dad talking about second hand smoke.... But the next day when I woke up I felt different.... not in a homo wimpy way but I realized how much music matters. Music is my favorite past time, I literally could live alone forever and be a hermit if I was provided with an Ipod and access to the internet. Its the remedy for everything this life has to offer and can soothe butt-hurtedness, cool the angry giant, make you unsad, and really adjust your major malfunctions if you know what to listen to. It can take a dull night and make it insane (go see a live Crystal Method show and you'll know what i'm talking about) or calm the chaos of an active mind (Explosions in the Sky). Music lets me focus on anything i'm doing and its weird because I can easily shut out the rest of the world and just focus on the task at hand, it also lets me get away and allow time for either pondering/introspection or just letting my mind wander, yeah i know... i'm really weird. But music is my therapy, it can change my mood from pissed as hell to calm and collected in under a min... what else can do that (other than mind altering substances) So yeah I owe a lot to that one experience and am now bored with this topic. Bottom line is music makes the world go round, except for scream-o and uber heavy metal.... thats not music, it's just plain gay.

Monday, December 8, 2008

An Ode to Dayquil


Soooo I have felt like crap for about two solid weeks, I went home for thanksgiving and caught what felt like the flu (minus the vomitus) and returned to Utah just in time to catch a supersized cold..... Gross. I hate being sick more than anything (besides onions & venomous snakes) the whole achey/hot/cold, crazy nightmares, and being the master of mucus sucks. That and I don't have a wife or my mom around (or a girlfriend for that matter) to tend to my delicate state. BUT!!! I do have DVR.... and the best part is it doesnt talk back or tell me to quit being a wimp. It still can't make me chicken soup though. Anyways I went to see my married buddies Sat. Night and had a blast, I miss seeing those guys all the time. Plus they married cool girls so Its always a good time. Although I did have this nagging feeling like I was a gold card member trying to be cool by hanging out in the platinum lounge (b/c of my Sans Uxor status) Then on Sunday I went to P-town to see my brothers and have dinner at my Sister-in-laws parents. They are Thai/Indian..... Yan can't cook jack compared to them!! The curry was amazing (I had Bombay House friday night but the Pimsukal's was better) Soooo Overall it was a most excellent weekend if I subtract the nastified plague and assault on my mucus membranes. IT SNOWED TODAY!! finally!! Christmas isnt the same if there isnt snow, if I was a Californicator I'd sprinkle potatoe flakes all over my lawn if thats what it took... Also to end this epistle, They have finally captured the Butt-Bandit !!!! yeah... that guy is a freak..... but it's kinda funny too. Anyways yeah i'm going home now, I've got a score to settle with some invaders tryin to crash my crib (to be explained later)

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Arrrrrr Matey's


Shiver me timbers, i love frickin pirates. Somali pirates?? not so much.... buuuut i still wonder if scurvy is a problem for them?? anyways this is a totally random post that i intend to fill with wonder, splendor, and other shiz i find entertaining/shareworthy. Good news... My lair is nearing completion..... i can't wait to start the debauchery and mayhem once it's fully operational. Morg and I just installed the remote-control slave pen and filled it with minions that are fully commited to do our bidding. but really, the basement is almost done and i'm impressed by our handiwork, it looks friggin tip top. For all the Ladies out there that read this.... check this site out http://www.dodtracker.com/deals/ A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. It's a reminder that i'm taken care of by the masters of the universe. For the dudes see above link and add this podcast http://thehistoryofrome.typepad.com/ It's the bomb-diggity-snip-snap-snatch. for a laugh, everyone check out: http://www.despair.com/viewall.html Sequence complete. Love, Happiness, Blood, and Conquest to all my friends (i just watched this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=drm_F0uGn4I&feature=related and am infused with bloodlust)

dude hugs, all that sissy crap, and a happy holidays to all

Mr. Stanley

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

One more random thought


you ever see the Gremlins? that movie scared the crap out of me when i was a kid and then as i got older i thought it was soooooo funny, well i just saw it on TV and it was almost the most retarded movie ever, although nothing could ever possibly be worse than garbage pail kids the movie, that was so bad it was almost good. messy tessy, foul phil, those cards were crazy, who the heck thought that crap up?. growing up in the 80's was a treat, neon, jamz, those weird striped pajama looking pants, and other ridiculous styles, especially the hair....what the heck were people thinking. its funny though because now instead of all that crazy wierd crap we have our little EMO buddies. honestly what kind of man wears ass tight tapered pants and covers half his face with his flattening-iron-straightened hair??? i thought that crap only existed in Japanese Anime?? lately when walking around town i feel like Adult Swim has somehow merged with our universe and become a reality!!!

Self Imposed Smackdown

As of late i have been a hermit and it's for many reason's. Mostly i'm remodeling my house and its sucked up lots of my free time, but also because i'm tryin to figure out lots of things... some about me, some about people in general. I've come to realize not many people actually get the gospel the way I do. I'm not claiming a pure knowledge or beating my chest at others but i do know that i have a different take than the majority. I'm for sure not getting into it on this but the bottom line is i think its more important how we treat other people in this life than worrying about crossing every T and dotting every I on our daily rulebook checklists.... If people were less concerned with themselves and more concerned with serving others and just being kind to everyone (and not in a care-bear-stare-bear way) life would be better for everyone. But everyone seems to have an agenda, whether its money, power, fame, or anything that brings attention to themselves and their deeds.... its disgusting. I think of how blessed i am and sometimes feel like i don't deserve what i have, and then on the flipside i catch myself selfishly wanting more...it's disgusting. Who the heck am i to ask for more than i've already been given? I had a rough patch there for a while and now that i'm clear of it i've discovered there are things that used to be so important to me, that now, i just don't give a damn about. I'm sadly devoid in some aspects and need to find out how to rekindle some flames that died in me, but for the most part the refiners fire wiped out some heavy flaws embedded in my system.... unfortunatley it also inadvertently burned some other parts to a crisp, namely my faith in other people. I'm intent on becoming someone i'm not, which is a man that dedicates all he can to improve his life and those around him. Someone that glories in God and not in himself, a humble, meek, submissive servant with no expectations nor desires for recognition or reimbursement (even from the Lord).....and i know this will probably take the rest of my life to accomplish but what better way to live my life and spend my time? my life so far is a sequence of steps forward and back, and i can see clearly that the steps forward involved selfless acts while the steps back were all selfish. maybe i'm crazy? i dunno, but things are changing and i can't be that guy if i'm not willing to sacrifice ...... so for now i'm sorting through rubble for pieces worth keeping/restoring and trying to make sense of what i should do. Introspection sucks.

Regrets are for gaylords


So I was thinkin this weekend about all the CSW's(see the title, i'm abbreviating for the sake of my lil sausages) in my life and i decided thats the worst mindset ever to have.... yes if you had made different choices in the past life could (but not neccesarily would) be different. But ya didnt and it is how it is, and it's obviously the way its supposed to be. The thing that sucks is not wishing you could jump into a souped up DeLorean, have doc throw some banana's in the flux capacitor, and then haul ass to the past to rectify stuff, but realizing what opportunites you let slip through your fingers or how you could have done better. Thats why hindsight is a douche bag. It lets you see your retardation to the fullest and then laughs while you self-ridicule your lackluster preformances/outcomes! buuuuuuuuut on the flipside hindsight lets you get a grip on all things good/bad from the past and gives you the chance to improve on mistakes, avoid similar ones, and also lets you see what you did right. Really though i was pondering choices over the past few years and yes, i let opportunities slide right past me that today make me think "man i was a dumbass" but oh well. I think its important to look at the past, but not dwell on it, and by looking i mean not regretting what we did/didnt do but how we can learn from what resulted from our choices so we don't let our future oppurtunities go to waste. So really, we can look into our past and use it to determine what happens in the future, if history decides to repeat itself.... so don't beat yourself up over crappy choices, instead prepare for the future so you're not such a dumbass next time......

Monday, March 24, 2008

Easter Bunny = Creepy as hell


I was thinking about the whole Easter concept this weekend and realized they took something good, commercialized it and changed the whole concept to a reedonkulous insane idea. What the hell do bunnies have to do with Jesus anyway? And where does this bunny get all his hard boiled eggs? Don't kids think like I did when I was little and wonder about the veracity of these non-profit entities that love to give kids stuff at times that coincide with Christ related events??? Easter is also a horrible contradiction to the saying "dont put all your eggs in one basket" instead it teaches children to do the EXACT opposite..... The Easter Bunny gives horrible investment advice if you ask me. Easter as the world now knows it had to be invented by some crazies trippin on something heavy. Just the idea of a giant rabbit hiding sweets and boiled eggs for kids is disturbing. Whack. I guess this also applies to Santa. Holidays get weirder to me as I get older and I guess thats what I'm trying to say. News: I am in the process of buying a house with my brother, and to tell you the truth it makes me want to barf. Houses = expensive. Me = poor. sooooo naturally with the markets in chaos (markets = bread and butter) I am paranoid daily about having a job the next day. I am writing this post at the behest of a few that seem to like my insanity. So be thou satisfied! Oh another thing thats been prickin my butt. How come everyone thinks I am in need of a wife no matter what the cost? Heck I'm looking but I feel like some people are desperate to see me hitched, or that its a end all solve all to the universe. How about I marry the right one when I'm ready and in the meantime I'll just relax waiting for HER to find ME and then do all the work.....hahaha kiddin, kinda. Life is good, Gwen is my favorite demon, I miss my brothers and am loving life. Now I just have to get the car I want, all the electronics, oversized house, and lots of other stuff I can't afford so I can fit in here in Utah.....

Monday, January 28, 2008

Return of the Sith


So after a sweet weekend of Babysitting my awesome niece, Paul Oakenfold, and a shabbas cinema event of star wars and random TLC medical insanity (the tree man made me sad/leak bile) shows i am officially ready to retire and put this weekend on repeat forever. Didnt accomplish much, freak didnt really do much but how come it was one of the best weekends ever?? i think more than anything i love hearing Gwen talk (and have it actually make sense) and just hanging out with the weasel. I cant wait until she's old enough to travel without a carseat and actually speak in logical sentences (bird-fly-gone is adorable but any pure blood romulan would barf upon hearing that) But the Star Wars hit the spot....frickin sweet. How do people really come up with those idea's. I mean i'm a freakin nerd but george lucas, Tolkien, and the Harry Potter Lady take the cake when it comes to ultimate nerdhood. And i'm not bashing at all, its nuts that they wrote those long books from made up stuff but then people made them into badass movies that were actually good. mad props to those fools for making my life that much better. Anyways I just wanted to report how kickass my weekend was. Peace out amigos. oh and just a side note........i miss my brothers. especially Jared. In case you dont know my brothers are pretty much my heroes and the coolest guys I know, even the eccentric-hippie one.

Monday, January 7, 2008

F'in F that.


Soooooo Yeah I aint too sure I like the holidays anymore, too much stress, crowded places, and running around...... arent breaks supposed to be relaxing??? I must say I really enjoyed my time at home and especially getting to see Jared, its been to long and sometimes I forget how funny my brothers are. Speaking of my brothers, its official, they really are my best friends, yeah retardedly cheesy but oh well. They frickin rule and make my life a billion times better and fill it with chaos & mayhem. Nate is a funny little freak and Jared has mellowed out in his old age. Bug is like unto "the dude" (in a good way), and morg....is morg, for those that know him you know what i mean. Life with out those guys would be lame and pretty boring. Although ultimate insanity happens whenever the stanley men get together (especially if board games are involved)....throw in a barnhart to stir the pot and its almost a gurantee that punches and insults (and sometimes dice) will fly...but you know what?? I wouldnt have it any other way. I love my family!!!!! and to anyone that doesnt like one of my brothers congrats I am now your worst frickin enemy forever.