Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The Death of Skeletor

One of the funniest things I've seen was in the old school Heman Cartoons, all of Skeletors minions are being captured by evil vines (controlled by a giant asparagus named Evilseed) and Beastman, while being entangled, asks Skeletor for help. Skeletors reply is " I can't worry about YOU! I'm too busy worrying about ME" so what does this have to do with me??? sadly that's pretty much been my motto for the last year. Soooooo yeah, here goes: Life's all about acquiring skills and learning, but sometimes we forget things that really are important.... like how to interact with women you are actually interested in and pursue it. I don't know what happened but I seem to have selectively erased my memories on that subject, dating for me has become like foreign policy between the US and North Korea.... and I for sure don't speak Korean nor care about the country but there's fear that they could unleash mass destruction on me if I neglect them much longer. I havent met a girl that I've been interested in forever. Maybe it's the age discrepancy in my ward? or that there aren't many girls that are over 23 that I'd date? but even when I find one thats somewhat interesting I'm oblivious as to whether they feel the same..... its like playing a game but not having an instruction manual with rules and directions how to go about things, and your team mate won't tell you jack cuz she expects you to do everything...... I never had any of these problems at school (beyond dating the wrong person for 3yrs too long), but seriously, I could read chicks like a friggin book.... now.... it's like watching the news in chinese, I can see & hear the people but have no effffffing idea what they are saying or trying to convey. Memories of my teenage years are resurfacing.....the awkwardness, nervousness, word vomits...... It's sad to admit that when it comes to girls (that I am interested in) I don't know what the heck I'm doing anymore. No more smooth moves, cocky comments, or going for the kill.... that's all been replaced by fear, insecurity, and sissyness..... this is a problem I've got to nip in the bud quick..... I took too much time off and seem to have forgotten how to take care of business, unfortunately all my wingmen are married & I don't know many people here, so there's the next battle. First get my butt out of my house and date more than my current once or twice a monther, then I need to remember where I left my balls when I'm with a girl I like. It's time for changes, I'm getting waaaaaaaaaaay to comfy with my current life and although I honestly am loving it, I know what needs to be done (my bishop, parents, married friends, and many others also know & love to remind me of this). But I have to say, I'm in no rush to even get a girlfriend let alone wife.... I just realize that I need to start dating more cuz I'm forgetting that there are other people in the world besides me myself and I. It's been really easy and nice just worrying about me, buying whatever I want, and pretty much being a selfish dude that keeps to himself (Hence the Skeletor stuff). But yeah, I don't want to end up living the rest of my life vicariously through my brothers. Anyways if you couldn't tell I feel kinda guilty for the last year or so cuz all I've done has really just been for my own gratification. I'm scared cuz it's not going to be easy and like I said I love my life the way it is but unfortunately my peers are correct and the scriptures back them up. So here goes nothin (or everything) BARF!!!!! I hate myself for even admitting this.


Steph said...

Matthew. I am glad you have realized that I am in this world AND so is Brandon. Remember us? Yep.. we are still in Utah. Everyone else left us.. but we are still here. Even though I am not a girl you could date, but still, I think I am pretty awesome. But Brandon on the other hand... I will let you take him on a date. He is great at listening.

Shar said...

I like where your heads at.

amanda said...

i love this honesty. so gritty and real.

what's wrong with girls over 23?