Tuesday, December 29, 2009

The Ex-Girlfriend

Sooo I did it... I got back together with my X... I know, I know... I'm an idiot... but I honestly have to say that I realized she's everything I've ever wanted and was foolish to take such a lengthy break. Before you think about chewing me out here are some of my reasons for the blessed reunion: She listens when I talk to her, tells me only really important updates on her life, lets me play video games (in fact she loves it when I do), lets me hang out with virtually anyone I want, only bugs me once a year for money, doesn't talk back or annoy me, has meltdowns once in a blue moon (and it's never my fault) is easily turned on & doesn't want to snuggle/chitchat after I get my game on, loves watching movies with me, lets me boss her around, doesn't care if I swear at her or around her, is infinitely patient, always does exactly what I want, she's rarely stubborn or demanding, she's tall, skinny & has curves in allllll the right places, she doesn't cheat but is totally cool with it if I do, she's always waiting for me when I get home & is totally fine should I choose to neglect her... basically she's perfect in every way possible and it's impossible to ever find a woman like her. So without further delay let me re-introduce the love of my life.....Bertha

She's on the left wearing white (I have no idea who that girl holding her is..)



Tuesday, December 22, 2009


Yeah, by the last few posts you might get the impression things are not so good for me.... quite the contrary. This happens to be a "in the moment" blogaritto that I sometimes vent on. Blessedly I am pleased to inform those that read this that, although the last year has been literally one of the craziest, most stressful, insane times of my life, I am also blessed a thousand times over. I have a job in this crazy economy, I have a warm home and enough to eat, I have a kickass family and totally awesome friends that support me, I have a solid relationship with my Savior Jesus Christ & God the father, I have my health, and soooo much more. There's ten times the good in my life than there is the bad.... Things at my job just got a heck of a lot better, personal trials have come to an end & the realization that you can only do your best is finally settling in this thick skull of mine. The problem is that I'm extremely hard on myself but for good reasons!! EX: should Jesus show up at my place tomorrow, I know I'm not who/where I want to be & shrink at the thought of that awesome yet possibly destructive meeting (by destructive I mean me being burnt to a crisp for being so wicked all the time). Each day is a blessing & we truly are lucky to be alive where we are/when we are. The silly little things I complain about on this are really just introspection or observations of things I see and need to apply in my life... when the trials pass I can come back and see how things turned out and where I went right/wrong. BUT if there's one thing I wish to express it's that everyday is a blessing, and also a trial. I suck at being peter priesthood, but I have a firm testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ and how it blesses my life every single day. For all the things (good & bad) that I've been through it's easy to see that it was all for my own good & I was able to extract the lessons/applications that were meant for me. I'm a very blessed person and hate to think I don't acknowledge that fact.  I still hate Christmas shopping though... it frickin sucks. Going to see Avatar tonight & I'm excited, Miss you frengs and hope all is well!

Peace & Joy to all my Homies,

Senor Stanley

Monday, December 21, 2009

Merry F#*$ing Christmas Bia

Bwahahahaha!!!! noooo I'm not a grinch, just realized I DO NOT feel the holiday spirit this year. I used to LOVE everything about this friggin holiday but this year.... I loathe it. Long lines, bitchy sales people, evil item snatchers, efffff finding parking, and a million other annoyances. But honestly I know why I hate this particular holiday season and it's my own fault.... see... I usually have all my shopping done by October or November at the very latest. Due to a insane year of slavery a la office that didn't happen. So I've finally had to experience what my previous genius prevented.... and I hate my life.  Goal for next year : be done shopping by the usual time frame. orrrrrr bring a taser/tranquilizer gun with me so I can "take care" of all the problems I've experienced the last week or so.  I Matthew Stanley swear on the blood that I will never do my Christmas shopping in December again (unless it's for the next year) or may my blood boil and I give up my first born.... (or if I do everyone is getting gift cards) I am officially a roid rager & didn't know it until I was at target and people were everywhere and all I could think about was drinking some riot punch and going ballistic on the shovey rude people & kicking annoying demon childrens faces off. Yeah that's right... someone stole the jelly out of my doughnut. Anyways Merry Christmas friends. I hope ya'll weren't stupid like me.

I feel better now. and Happy Chanukah as well

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

You ever get the feeling...

That someone is totally full of crap & then confirm it? it's a paradox, you feel vindicated but at the same time disappointed b/c you were hoping to be wrong. It's funny what people think they can get away with. It's also sad what people are capable of because they think they can get away with it. It gets even better when you know the truth & then continue to go along with the charade until either the truth comes out or you walk away cuz the crap just gets deeper. That may sound strange but I'm not one to confront people, it never does any good, you never get real answers just more lies so it's better just to cut your losses & peace out. Doing things that way also gives the person an opportunity to rectify the situation and redeem themselves (cuz lets face it, we've all been guilty of this at some point) It's sad though.... I don't get why people do those types of things in the first place... it just ain't right. People today expect what they aren't willing to give (the truth). Homey don't play that. And this applies to friendships, relationships, marriages, and pretty much every other human interaction. Look at all the high profile people in positions of public trust/power/influence that live double lives....they may be good at what they do but they suck as a person. It's yet another example of how crappy people are becoming.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Homo Erectus Sinistre

People are funny.... I recently noticed that for the most part (emphasis on MOST PART) people only seem to want what they want until they actually get it... and I mean that across the board, whether it's material goods, affection, or even a lifestyle. Why is that?? is it normal?? and yes I am totally guilty of lusting for things and then once I attain them I lose interest quickly (video games is a perfect example) Is it that we are easily bored? or is it that feeling that you've got it, now it's time to find something better? Where is our ability to be content? how come we can't appreciate things more, especially when we've fought long and hard for them? It's weird hearing someone talk about their promotion yet complain that they felt they deserved better. Or watching a guy/girl finally get that person they were chasing just to lose interest once the chase is over.... it's effed up. Like I said, in no way am I perfect but I am disappointed in people in general regarding this. Another weird aspect is how people go bonkers when that thing/person/situation they took for granted finds new life elsewhere. It's crazy how quickly people all of a sudden appreciate something that they didn't give a crap about (but only because of an outside stimulus) Is it greed? selfishness? failure to fully appreciate blessings?? What makes us act so retarded? the last five or so years have taught me much, like making sure to actually think about why I want the thing in the first place, or what are the pro's and con's?? is it worth a long term investment or is it just a whim? My goal is to think it all through before I go all in. It doesn't always work though. But I've finally got a good grasp on recognizing what my motives/intentions truly are and what the possible consequences of my actions will be.... It's others motives/intentions that remain the enigma and based on experience I definitely lack faith in my fellow man to do the same. Does that make me bad/paranoid? I consider it self-preservation... thoughts amigos?